So, if I haven't told ya'll already (what readers I have left, that is), I think of myself as southern with an educated northern edge and a potty mouth that has only gotten worse with age.
I consider myself to have all the good qualities of the south (good manners, laid-back attitude, good cook, kind to children and old people and animals, etc.) but minus the bad qualities (ignorance, bigotry, and conservatism).
*Please send hatemail to the address on the right.*
I was watching Comedy Central this past weekend and there was a stand-up comedian that was remarking about how he was originally from Alabama. And when counting in Alabama, you only need 3 numbers... one, two, and a shitload (pronounced shhheeeeitload).
This made me laugh.
But then it got me thinking...
Hey... I say that!
"I have a shitload of work to do."
"I have a shitload of Girl Scout Cookies in my living room."
"I have a shitload of respect for that guy."
I really DO say it. A lot. I say "a shitload" shitloads of times thruout the day!
What exactly is a shitload? I don't even want to begin to speculate.
All I have to say is that I am appalled at my lack of verbal finesse when it comes to expressing amounts of things. I have lost respect for myself.
How much respect?
A shitload.
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Just another peek into the crazy, caffeine-fueled thoughts of some chick you don't know.
4 comments:
You know, I think your problem is really your lack of focus. See, if you just used "shitload" in the same context every time, then yeah, you would certainly be justified in losing respect for yourself. However, you are able to creatively work it into new and exciting situations. Therefore, you really should just have more respect for yourself than when you first discovered your frequent usage of "shitload." Or perhaps I'm just talking out my ass.
A shitload is approximately one-fifth of an assload.
An assload is a variable integer directly related to your average weekly intake of Girl Scout Cookies.
I hope this makes everything clear.
I want some Girl Scout Cookies.
LOL.
That was awesome. Totally laughed and enjoyed it.
Thanks friend!
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